As soon as you get pregnant its like the advice faucet turns into a flood. I don't know what it is about people who think your body/child/excretions become apart of their business! When I was pregnant,the advice dam started to break and I heard all sorts of crap from people, no do eat that, yes eat that, do this, dont do that! When Caitlin was born, it was full on flood status. You should hold your boob like this, be sure to wipe your butt this way, dont let her cry, let her cry! Oy vey!! I've always wanted to respond so here's my chance!!!
1. Yes, thats my kid laying on the floor having a fit, would you care to join her, apparently they are fun, she sure seems to like them. I think she's learning a new relaxation art.
2. I'm so glad your perfectly dressed, impeccably clean child is doing this or that, my hand me down, dirty kid is having fun playing at the park while your kid keeps getting told to watch out for that dirt, or let me wash you off.. LET THEM HAVE FUN! Thats why there are baths!
3. Yup, I keep my kid quiet with a lollipop when I cant handle it anymore, dont like it, shut up.
4. Yes she still has a pacifier, would you like to borrow her for 3 weeks and take it away then return her to me so I can sleep too? Thanks, didnt think so.
5. Thanks for buying my 2 year old this lovely halter top and skirt combo, she wont be wearing it, why you ask? Because she 2, not 22.... I dont even wear halter tops and skirts come to think of it, neither should you!
6. Oh, yes my kid is sick, sorry we cant play today, why? That would be because you thought bringing your snot nose, hacking cough kid out was a good idea a week ago.... ya....
7. Thanks so much for the workout advice and gym reccomendation, and by thanks I mean thanks so much for making me feel like a fat blob who doesnt know how to locate a gym. And at least now I can say Im feeling better by doing something.
8. Im so glad little Johnny can name all the presidents, in order, but if you give him a box and a ball can he play for hours? No? Didn't think so.
9. Why dont we skip this whole my kid did this at 5 months, oh yours didnt..blah blah blah, and say you win, because I simply dont care!
10. Shut up, shut the freaking front door up. (thats my most grown up response)
I know this sounds harsh in some ways, but I would never say this stuff in real life, and guess what its my blog, I can say what I want so , neh! :)
It's so annoying when people give all this advice. Haven't most of them probably been through the same thing and hated it just as much? #6 right on the money
ReplyDeletesaying hi from over at MK's :)